To Forget

I. Between the Threshold and the Door

[0:05 – 0:26]
To forget. To stop thinking.
About you. About me.
About us.
What we were. What—
we could have been
What we are

[0:26 – 0:58]
From friends to lovers to strangers
From a symphony to a line in a song that’s already been sung. A sequence of notes never to be played again. A dissonant chord echoing through the vast emptiness of life. A fading sound.

[0:58 – 1:09]
Hopelessly lost. Dying.

II. The Room

[1:30 – 2:13]
I sit in this sterile room. Memories of you leaking through the cracks in the walls. Trying to capture the moment. Trying to freeze it, own it, when suddenly I realize the clock doesn’t care. The arms keep moving. Hours pass like seconds and then you’re gone.

[2:13 – 2:50]
Saying the words feels like cigarette burns on my skin. Small scars where you should be.
There’s a window and I look out. The world – my – world is stuck between gray clouds and a blue sky. Rocking back and forth. Never steadying itself. A constant motion between hope and despair.

[2:50 – 3:22]
I breathe on the glass and try to trace your name through the condensation. The letters vanish with the cold that spreads around the room – around me – and only my fingerprints remain on the glass. I can’t take my hands off the cold glass for fear of losing you. For fear of letting go.

[3:22 – 3:42]

I kiss you
I touch you
I hold you
Never – again

III. Back in the House

[4:01 – 4:20]
It’s time to leave now. I have to go. I can leave the room whenever I want. Enter, whenever I need, only to see that you are not there. Never will be.

[4:20 – 4:51]
When I leave the room a piece of me will stay inside with the ghosts of my memories.
When I close the door the peace in me stays behind, falling victim to the specters.
Walk with me through the house instead of being a haunting presence in its many rooms.

[4:51 – 5:12]
I hear your voice in every song on the radio.
I see your face in every picture on the TV.
See a madman in the mirror.
I see me.

[5:12 – 5:44]

If I blow my brains out, will you be gone?
There’s a body lying on the floor.
You stare down from the walls.


6 responses to “To Forget

  1. Pingback: The Child has a Name | The Idiosyncracy of Life

  2. Pingback: Behind the Glass #2 | The Idiosyncracy of Life

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